Wednesday, April 30, 2008


Quote from a Louisiana friend at dinner the other night:

"We're all goin' to die. Might as well order dessert first."

I love her logic.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Paris: Episode 2, Your Feet Can Lead The Way

It has been 21 days since Paris: Episode 1, The Launch of an Overseas Recollection. I have seriously pondered and wondered what my random blurb of the long awaited and long anticipated (mainly by me)Episode 2 would and should be about? My indecisiveness has caused me great pains these past 21 days. Nights of deep sleep, nights requiring lots of chocolate, nights consuming my mind with multiple bottles of wine, nights where American Idol put me under a no-blogging spell, and nights of torture being forced to watch Heidi Montag's bad Botox lips jibber jabber about shallow nothings...and I have decided it is the most mgnificent time to pay tribute to my feet.

Yes. I said my feet. I have this strange of many strange quirks. There is this very literal with a slight bit of sentimental sarcasm side of me that requires me to take pictures of my feet when I travel... or whenever I feel like documenting a special event or moment. I do not know if it is their rice patty squatting capabilities or their brown-yellow jaundice pigmentation that requires the camera to snap a recollection of their existence. It might be the massive big toe. If you want to verify the big toe, I have another post, "Remember To Take It Step By Step," that documents some special foot moments as well. This strange quirk of mine has been a part of my life for quite some time now. Again, everyone else thinks it (me) is strange or wierd and again, I do not care. I just keep on keepin on.

The first sighting of my feet in Paris is at Notre Dame. This photo was taken just outside the Hunchback's hopping grounds on what looks to be cobblestone. They were taking a bit of a rest after walking the grounds of worshippers, candles, tourists, stain-glass, and Jesus. Lots of Jesus. The were also blatantly avoiding all the beggars just outside the entrance and exit to the church. Is it wrong how obviously urgent my feet were scurrying away from the pretend needy people outside of a church? Hey, don't judge. Parisians have health and school...meaning college, paid for by the government. I have little sympathy. whew. They (my feet) were tired from all the avoiding. Luckily, I was forced to purchase brand new shoes from New Balance right before I left for this trip.

After the feet were rested up from all the Hunchbacking and Jesus-ing, they move on to the Eiffel Tower. Same day. No cool cobblestone to walk on, though. Way super tired feet so there was no climbing of the stairs to the top. These feet were swollen and tired inside their haven of New Balance cushion. They are greatly anticipating their departure for Belgium in a few hours also.

Belgium. My Aunt's house. I love my Aunt. She's great. She is shorter than me. (I am only 5ft. 1inch)! I am expecting a whole post about my Belgium trip to soon follow. My feet look pretty slim in these boots! Shocker!

Monmarte. I am pretty sure I have mentioned the stairs from Hell that lead to Monmarte. These feet belong to Bridget and me. They are pissed, they are exhausted, and they refuse to be rushed up another set of stairs without a standing with one hand on hip break.

Leaving Paris. Bridget and me putting our feet up as we wait to board our plane back to the U.S. It was a good trip, but boy was I glad to step on solid U.S ground.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Fabulous Film Friday


Let's get the formal stuff out of the way.

This is all you get from Yahoo! Movies...not a whole lotta synopsis today:
An accounting consultant, while passing from one job to another, meets a charismatic, womanizing lawyer who personifies everything the numbers cruncher wishes he could be. The accountant delves into an erotic world of underground sex clubs.

Now, on to more important things.

I have Aussie and Scottish love filling my heart today.

Truth be told...I do not even really know what "Deception" is really about other than it's a thriller and it seems like it would be a do-over. A do-over being a film that has already been done with a different cast of characters, different year, different budget, same point, similar problems, similar "thrill moments," blah blah blah...been there, seen it, hated not want to see it again. I want something original, people! -OR- I will absolutely accept Hugh Jackman and Ewan McGregor in a "my life is a musical" heartbeat.

I just j'adore Hugh Jackman...I mean who doesn't? You are not human if you don't think this is not worth j'adoring:

How can you resist a man that looks soooo good frolicking in the ocean??

I just wanted to throw in another one of him because I can... and I know you will thank me for it.

Now, Ewen McGregor. Another Hottie!

I somehow managed to get a pic of him in a towel too! Go figure. God loves me.

Look at those eyes! uh, your blues make my heart melt.

I don't care what you say...but the tat on the arm is sexy.

So, enjoy your weekend with the image of these hotties in your head. I don't care if you really go see the movie or not. lol.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Don't Ration the Rice

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! What will I do without my rice??!! I seriously might go into convulsions. Don't ration the rice! Whatever you do..Dont't ration the rice!

Sexiest Women

An annual online poll named Heidi Montag from “The Hills” No. 44 sexiest woman in the WORLD. Can we say vomit?

She has bleach nasty blonde hair, way too fake boobies, and too much Botox in those rank lips. Not only is her outside fake, but her insides are just rotten! She is totally dishonest and a total liar. She’s a top #1 loser.

Lauren Conrad only got No. 95 on the list. WTF? How did she get ranked lower than Heidi?? Lauren is far better quality anything than Heidi!

Who was number 1? Some girl named Megan Fox. I can see it.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Daddy's Birthday

Yesterday was my Daddy's birthday. My Daddy is a pretty simple man. He likes to tell not-so-funny jokes and anecdotes and be the only one laughing at his not-so-funny jokes and anecdotes. If you knew him, you would know how absolutely accurate this description is. He thinks he is hilarious.

Anyway, back to his simplicity. My dad believes a good pair of jeans should not cost over $20 (I know...blasphemy) and can be purchased no where else other than at wal-mart. He believes that DVD collections and clocks make the world go absolutely round and round and round again. He believes that having a bowl full of candy in arms distance from his recliner at all times is integral for eternal and internal happiness.

So, what to get Daddy for his 64th birthday. Easy. A DVD. I refuse to get him another clock. But, I know DVD's are his #1 obsession...and that is no exaggeration. He loves to collect sets: The Lord of the Rings, The Godfather's, and any movie that has a sequel...he doesn't even have to like it or watch it...he just has to have it. Whatever.

His latest DVD collection obsession is Magnum P.I. Yes, I said Magnum P.I. You didn't even know they had that out on DVD, did ya? Well, the obsession started at Christmas. Prior to yesterday, he had already had all the sets that had been released so far: Seasons 1-5. My dad never fails to keep on top of these things and never fails to let everyone know that his birthday is coming up and that they (the DVD Gods) just released seasons 6-8 and where I can purchase them for him. So, for his birthday I got him the Final Season...season 8. And boy, oh boy. If you ever want to make a 64 year old man giddy...Magnum P.I. will definatly do the trick.

Ahh, you got to love simplicity. And my Daddy.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

What Do You Think This Might Mean???

So after a long day of pretending to work and pretending that I have a productive life, I came home to this: three dogs playing innocent and pointing paws at one another, whimpering, "he did it, she did it."

What do you think the signs are trying to tell me? hmmmmm.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Dear Pope

Dear Pope,

What up, your Royal Papacy? I hope your flight to the U.S. was absolutely wonderful and holy. I am writing you this letter because I want to apologize for the fact that I am the worst Catholic in the world, yet I still strongly claim to be Catholic since I was raised Catholic and all the other churches I have tried to convert to and “try out” have totally wierded me out. That is a story in itself.

I felt it was necessary to write you today because I believe in signs. The Catholic religion has been a lingering and random motif in my life the last few days. How, you are probably wondering? Well, first, there is always my mother who yells at me for not going to church…even though I am an adult. She seriously expects me to drive 30 minutes to another town so that she can have a church going partner to kneel and pray with. Can you believe that? There is a wonderful Catholic Church located right around the corner from where I live…but it is always really packed with loyal churchgoers like yourself. My agoraphobia in combination with the holding hands thing gets in the way with that…I am sure you understand. But I drive by the church quite frequently and normally think of Christ and God and how they will always love me and I will always love them.

Catholicism has also been a motif in my life lately for a few other small reasons. For instance, the movie “The Da Vinci Code” was on the other day…and I watched it. I do love that Mary Magdalene regardless of the rumors. There also was the prayer for patience and the ability to possess forgiveness I made the other day when Clint didn’t do what I asked him to do. Can we work on him? We can talk about him later.

And then there is my love for bread and wine. Who would have thought such a religious act of devotion could transform into a daily necessity for me? I know. God thought of it. You’re so funny and wise. Rather than once a week, the presence of the body and blood of you know who is quite the regular pastime in our household. You should stop by some time!

So, back to your visit. How is G. Bush? He hasn’t said anything dumb yet has he? I know, I know. Idiocrosy just falls out of his mouth. Sure, he is probably a super nice man, but he thinks he is so funny when he is sooooo not…kind of like my father. Clint thinks my father is awesome and funny….I told you we need to work on him.

Anyway, I just wanted to say hi and make sure you know that I am still a Catholic…just a modern day do-it-my way kind of version. I am still a good person with good morals, good ethics, and understanding. I am super honest…which some people in today’s world don’t really appreciate. I know, I need to work on my gossiping. But, for the most part, I just live my day-to-day life with a cross around my neck, truth and honesty in my words and actions, and a great sense of humor.

So, sorry I am the worst Catholic in the world, but I am not perfect. I pray that you have a great and safe visit! You are always welcome in my home if you ever want some bread and wine!


Monday, April 14, 2008

Just-a-playin Around

Photos by Deb. hahaha. who can name that movie?!!

Anyway. Focus. Here are some more pics as a result of my playing around with my camera...and my dogs. What have I discovered?

1. I have a lot to learn!
2. I need a better and upgraded version of photoshop.
3. My dog Trooper is terrified of the camera and runs away as soon as I grab the gizmo gadget.
4. Ruby and Nyxie are camera sluts.
5. This is so fun!

Although Trooper is a camera pansy, I was able to get one of the best pics of him!

Ruby: "ummm, mother, can you please hold off the picture nazi role you have embraced so suddenly so that I can knaw on this massive stick for a while?

Picture Nazi: "absolutely not you sweet thing you, you just keep a knawing away."

Ruby: "sigh. you can be such an annoying human, mother. well, can you at least get my good side?"

Picture Nazi: "whatever you want my sweet little pumpkin."

Time for Nyxie's close up!

Time for Roo's close up!

Picture Nazi: "Nyxie girl, are you laughing at mommy?"

Nyxie Rae: "tee hee hee tee hee hee. I just remembered that picture you took of Roo that made her look like Jabba the Hutt."

Ruby: "Not funny."

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Sweet Slumber

My New Little Gizmo Gadget

If you do not know by now, I will inform you that I am one very frugal little monkey. I wouldn't say cheap, but others might.

I rarely buy anything "fun" because I am obsessed with saving money...a whole other issue of mine on top of many others. So, when I decide that I would like something, I tend to obsess over this "something" for at least two weeks and most times several months. It is quite obnoxious to all that are around me because this "something" will be the only thing you will here me talk about when we are together. I will tell you how much I really really want it and I will tell you all the different places I have found it for a cheaper price. I will tell you my strategy if I were to get this "something" and what I would do with this "something." This is my process, people. You will tell me to go buy it already and shut-up. This is basically what happened with my decision to finally get a new camera.

Last year I had a digital camera. I don't remember what brand or anything special about it other than it was silver and digital. I bought it on a whim a couple of years ago because I needed a camera for a trip and the camera I purchased was just under $100...affordable and justifiable. So, last year around April, when I was moving into my new home, I did something I would not normally do. I left this camera sitting out somewhere in chewing reach of one of my dogs. Of course they -the dogs- found it. And I have been without a camera since. Why? Because I haven't been able to get myself to spend the dinero.

Here was my issue: I had always wanted a NICE camera. I took a photography class in college and found that I loved taking photos...I just never had the equipment and I was always full of excuses. In order for me to have a camera that I would be super happy with, I would definately need to shell out some mullah. So, I sat without a camera of my own for a year.

The past three weeks have been incredibly obnoxious for myself and my clint. After seeing the beautiful pics my sis' camera took, I made the committment to obsess over cameras for weeks and weeks until I found one that was right for me. I should probably get to the point, huh?

I bought myself a camera! It is a Canon PowerShot G9 and I am super stoked about how to use it! It is so rad. I know, it makes me blurt out silly adjectives as if I was raised by surfers.

So, I took some photos and played around with them on my photoshop. I had no real idea what I was doing...but I love black and whites and I will probably cover my home in my black and white photos once I get good at it. Check these out:

My little Roo face.

Mr. Trooper boy.

Miss Nyxie Rae.

And the old gas lamp post in my backyard!

I can't wait to learn how to REALLY use this stuff!

Friday, April 11, 2008

Fabulous Film Friday

I am torn today. Although there was not one film that stood out to me or a film that I have been anxiously waiting its release, I was torn on which film to feature today. So, since this is my blog and I can do whatever I please...I have chosen two films that I would be interested in seeing.

What do you think of these two movies?
Would you like to see one and not the other?

Smart People

Film synopsis from Yahoo! Movies:

Professor Lawrence Wetherhold might be imperiously brilliant, monumentally self-possessed and an intellectual giant--but when it comes to solving the conundrums of love and family, he's as downright flummoxed as the next guy. His collegiate son won't confide in him, his teenaged daughter is an acid-tongued overachiever who follows all too closely in dad's misery-loving footsteps, and his adopted, preposterously ne'er-do-well brother has perfected the art of freeloading. A widower who can't seem to find passion in anything anymore, not even the Victorian Literature in which he's an expert, it seems Lawrence is sleepwalking through a very stunted middle age. When his brother shows up unexpectedly for an extended stay at just about the same time as he accidentally encounters his former student Janet, the circumstances cause him to stir from his deep, deep freeze, with consequences for himself and everyone around him.

The Smart People movie trailer:

Chaos Theory

Film Synopsis from Yahoo! Movies:

Frank Allen, celebrated author of the bestseller The Five Minute Efficiency Trainer, has perfected the art of living via a foolproof system of timetables and index cards. In fact, his daily "to do" lists are legendary. A man known for playing it safe, Frank doesn't believe in spontaneity. Every choice he makes is deliberately designed to contribute to a well-ordered, predictable life. But life, as he soon learns, never adheres to a strict schedule. Frank's wife, Susan, and seven-year-old daughter, Jesse, find his obsession charming in small doses, but as a steady diet it can be very frustrating. One morning, Susan attempts to loosen her husband's scheduling stranglehold by adding ten minutes to his day. But, by setting the clock backward instead of forward, she inadvertently unleashes a series of mishaps that turn his meticulously ordered life upside down. A belligerent ferryman, a ruthless seductress, a reluctant mother-to-be and the secret amor of his best friend, Buddy, combine to send his life into complete chaos. As his life unravels in several directions simultaneously, however, a stunning family revelation forces Frank to look fate squarely in the eye. Shaken to his core, he starts living entirely "in the moment," allowing him to defy the conventions that have heretofore defined him. Those carefully coordinated index cards that had once kept his life in perfect order now become a deck of chance as Frank scribbles spontaneous ideas on random cards, shuffles, chooses and follows the luck of the draw--with unexpected results. Frank is about to discover that not even an efficiency expert armed with timetables and index cards can change the serendipitous nature of family and friendship, love and forgiveness.

The Chaos Theory movie trailer:

I heart Ryan Reynolds...even when he looks like this:

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Paris: Episode 1, The Launch of an Overseas Recollection

So, after heavy contemplation and ridiculously unneccessary indecisiveness, I have decided that my Paris Memoir will be posted in Episodes. They will be random, unplanned, and unexpected in hopes to keep you coming back for my pointless and sometimes seemingly endless blurbs. So, without further adieu...I present to you Paris: Episode 1, The Launch of an Overseas Recollection.

Our flight left on a Sunday afternoon but the day was also Daylight Savings. I was plagued with this uneasy feeling in my paranoid mind that I would miss my flight because of possibly setting my clocks backward rather than forward (fall back/spring forward!) or the one clock I continuously checked throughout the day would be the one clock I didn't change or I changed it completely wrong. The result: me checking every clock I could find and checking them every ten minutes. I annoy myself.

Moving on to more enticing moments:

Our arrival to Paris de Galle.

We were greeted by our friend, (we will call her "M") and her friend Sebastian. He does not speak a lot of English and neither Bridget nor I speak a bit of French other than "bonour." Oh well. "M" speaks both for her because this arrival was only the beginning of her constant translating...I still think she makes things up in her translations just to get some entertainment for herself. I would.

Anyway, "M" made a homemade sign she held at the arrival gate to ensure Bridget and I would not miss her. (I apologize ahead of time for what the sign said, but I have to be truthful in my telling of actual events.) Our welcome sign said something to the nature of: "Welcome, Motherfuckers!" The highlight being the "MF" word. Our friend "M" loves this word and is convinced most Parisians do not understand the meaning or offense behind it. And as she yelled the expression and made sure her sign was seen, I found no one who cared. Maybe she is right. So, what did I learn?? I learned you can go to Paris and scream the "MF" word in public and no one will care.

Moving on. I had to tell our "MF" story, but the remainder of this post will be an overview of some of my favorite highlights of the trip.

Bridget fits in. While waiting to have our money exchanged, Bridget bets us whether or not she will fit in the kiddie ride. She won.

I disovered I love escargot! Yum! It doesn't look appetizing at all, but it tastes so good!

I love public transportation! I wish the OKC had some good public transportation.

Even in the Louvre we can't be discreet. AND how do you pronounce the Louvre? I say it as if it is spelled Loove. They (my Parisian friends) say it as if it is spelled Loove-ra. Am I wrong and have I been pronouncing it like a dumb American?

Mona really does look like she is following you with her eyes!! Kinda strange.

Somehow we stumbled upon what I am sure is the only hot dog stand in all of it ironic that it was in the gay district?

Eiffel Tower. Can you see me?

Toilettes! Pay per pee. lol.

Lighting a candle in Notre Dame. It cost me 2 Euros! Even saying a prayer is expensive!

I have discovered that I have a lot of photos of me EATING!!! What is up with that? This was the Frenchie's version of fast food. Just like U.S. fast sucks.

And of course, Bridget's broken brella. It started raining while we were at the top of Montmarte and none of us had an umbrella. Luckily (more like duh, they know how to market to tourists!), there were some souvenire shops nearby and we each purchased a new Parisian umbrella for, I think, 7 Euros. Bridget's broke within the first 3 minutes due to the wind. She was not happy. I am still laughing.