Friday, May 22, 2009

When Are You Going to Get Married?

That seems to be the popular question to ask me lately. I’m beginning to believe that everyone got together and decided to ask me this question all at the same time thinking it might get me in some kind of hurry. So, I’m setting the record straight.

If you know me really well, you know that I am kind of the exception to most girl rules. I don’t like the color pink, I don’t like scrapbooking, I don’t care for crafts, I don’t enjoy shopping, I’m not a fan of heels or owning lots of shoes, and I don’t like to wear make-up. I'm sure I could come up with more dislike, but I'll leave it at that. I like comfy jeans especially if they have holes, tight comfy t-shirts, flip flops or any form of sandal or cool athletic shoes. I like having messy natural hair with no hair products in it and I don’t brush my hair either. I got a haircut last week and it was the first haircut I had gotten in a year and 4 months. I enjoy being outdoors and doing adventurous activities or reading a book. The one girlie thing that I can really admit to is that I love wearing dresses in the summer.

I definitely have never been in a rush to get married or have kids. Final.

Sadly and to much of everyone’s disappointment and dismay, this is probably not going to change…at least for now. Go ahead and curse and scoff at me…I’m used to it and immune to it by now.

I explained to an inquiring mind the other day that I just don’t feel the need to rush into getting married. I want it to be right and when I know it is right it will happen. This inquiring mind pleaded that they just wanted to see me settled and happy; and to that I say: I am happy. I don’t need to be married to someone to be happy. And for this thought process I am grateful.

I don’t know how I came to be so unconventional, non conservative, stubborn, or just plain different from most people around me; I just am. If it makes you feel any better, I do want to get married…eventually, but I’m still only 26 years old (almost 27 years old in July, cough cough) and it will happen when it is supposed to happen. And to disappoint you probably even more, I don’t even know if I want kids. I might, but I just don’t know right now. I might want to adopt a little Asian baby.

So, if you’re curious when I’m going to get married, you know just as much as I do. I don’t know. I’m sure when I do know something, you will know shortly after.

Don’t get me wrong, I know that most of this inquiry is due to love and care and worry. But, trying to scare me into getting married soon by saying, “Your dad is not getting any younger” just won’t fly with me in my book. I’m very aware of what is going on around me, but I’m still not putting myself into a situation if I’m not prepared for it.

Plus, if I were to begin thinking about getting married, it still probably wouldn’t happen for a while because I’ve never seriously thought about what kind of wedding would suit me well. And I’m sure I’d be totally indecisive about it and it would take me a very long time to figure it out. So, don’t get your hopes up anytime soon, people. I’m not.

Love you. Wish you well. I hope everything is beautiful and happy in your life. Let’s just enjoy today and wish for an even better tomorrow.

Keep on Keepin on.

5 comments:

It's Because I'm the Mom said...

Wait till you DO get married...then it will be "when are you going to have a baby?"

Ha!

Seriously, don't get so upset, they ask because they love you and want to see you enter into an institution with a 50% success rate.

Love ya!

Deb said...

lol. i know it's because they love me. i love your comment about wanting to see me enter into an institution with a 50% success rate. awesome. :)

jmcqueen82 said...

One of the things that I absolutely love most about you is the fact that you are who you are no matter what everyone else wants you to be. In all the years I have known you, rarely have I ever seen you waver in the slightest from what you want for yourself, or what you believe to be the best for you. I truly admire the HELL out of that.

Screw convention.

Do what you have done your whole life.... what is best for Deblinga. To thine own self be true lady!!

Blondie said...

A freakin Men! I get sick of that question too. People even ask when I'm having kids. REALLY? I'm not even married yet, can we slow things down a little? I totally feel the same way. It's because we live in the bible belt and that's all most people here think about and want to do with their lives.

In all reality we both are still very young and have the rest of our lives to be married, if that's what we choose (I mean to our guys, not each other, that sounded a little gay, which would be fine if we were gay, but we aren't so...never mind I'm digging a hole). If we lived on the east or west coast, the fact that we aren't married wouldn't even come up.

And like you said, it's to make others feel better...what's most important is that you feel ok with your choices. Awesome post!

Loves you Deb...Farmers Market, you me Saturday!

C said...

Oh, Deb! I remember getting so annoyed when people asked me that question. Seriously, people. It's annoying.

Because I'm the Mom is right. After you get married, it'll be "So when are you going to have a baby?"! I think people were asking Hubby and me that question AT OUR WEDDING!!! LOL!

As soon as I had Little One (almost seven months ago!), people asked, "So when are you having baby #2?"!!! OMG! I JUST had a baby! LOL!

Great post, Deb. XOXO